You Don't Say A blog by Demetria McNeal, PhD

Most of us will find ourselves in situations with a friend or family member that leaves us speechless. Literally, we don’t know what to say or do. Why do we feel this way? Usually, it is because we are embarrassed, feel guilt or shame, or even anger. Simply, we are unsure of how to respond.…

Closure is usually something we feel we need and is necessary in order to “move on.” However, closure can seem impossible if the person has died. But it is indeed possible. Here are two ways you can gain closure when a loved one has died: Visiting their resting place: Physically going to a cemetery, mausoleum,…

The onslaught of social media and advanced technologies has made is so much easier to connect with someone—at a distance. It seems the more options there are for us to connect with one another creates greater separation between us. Relationships can only be forged so far and grow to a certain degree when relying on…

The simplest solution to a misunderstanding or miscommunication is often the best one. But when it comes to improving communication, many of us get lost in unrealistic expectations and set on ‘being right’ over gaining understanding. An uncomplicated way to communicate is to say exactly what you mean to say. Do not sugar coat the…

Stigmata or stigma as it is widely known, is when someone, something, or a behavior is considered undesirable or devalued. Think “I would never want to be XXXX” or “How could someone ever do XXXX”. The XXX are the stigma of the situation. Shame. Guilt. Hate. Division. These are some of the feelings that are…

Do you find you are often misunderstood? Or do you have to say, “I did not mean it that way” more often than you care to? Or you feel others “twist your words?” Well, you are not alone. Many of us do not communicate very well. We talk a great deal, but not necessarily communicate.…

Stingy. Fat. Smart. Dependable. Felon. Reliable. Thief. Funny. Charismatic. Clingy. Nice These are not just words. These are judgements we make about ourselves or others or have even been made about us. You see, we all judge. That doesn’t make it right, but it does make it a real issue that most of us do…

You set goals in many areas of your life. Exercise goals. Professional goals. Financial goals. Relationship goals. But how often do you think about communication goals? Yes, that is a thing! Think about the number of times that you had a plan in mind for how a conversation would go, and when it was over…